and welcome to my new website, Lorna - created for you by Tom at Design Timbre! Where am I on? Answers. Pictures? Yes. Downloadables for harried listings agents? Of course, what else! Lorna is your resource for my work and I will add more cool stuff as time allows/passes/ebbs.

You see, I want to be a small part of your lives. Follow me on Twitter or become a friendopolski by joining the Mailing List. Contact me about work or anything else or download pictures or biography for professional reasons or just to print on a pillowcase or toilet roll. There are places that will do that for you but I am not in charge of them. I love you.

At the moment, like all who value the ambivalent attention of a feckless public over the footwear needs of our dependants, I am preparing for the Edinburgh Festival. My show Silent But Deadly - poster on the left - is in preview around the country, my Live Dates page will tell you where if you are a 'reader' or click here to buy tickets for Edinburgh!

If you are not a 'reader' then why am I trying to communicate with you in this way instead of by mp3? Hello? Hello you illiterate fool! Heh heh the luxury of being so rude! Ignoramus! NaÏf! Hahahaha. Anyway befriend me on facebook and I will message you about previews to within an inch of your life. I like standup a lot at the moment and you will see this in my pleased face. I do raps now. So anyway, hope to see you soon. Peas. Dx

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